"Mommy, Why Are You Crying?"

As a parent with Facebook, I read A LOT of parenting articles that people post, even if they have nothing to do with the stage my children are in or if I agree or disagree with the author - I find myself reading a lot of parenting blogs. It is never with any judgement especially since I had two children who never took pacifiers so they always screamed in the supermarket and I had one champion sleeper and one child who didn’t sleep through the night until she was 18 months old and I had one child who baby led weaned and another who I thought would walk down the aisle with a pureed menu at the wedding, but I love to hear different perspectives and any helpful advice is great advice – parenting is really hard!

Today I found myself in a really awkward position and realized I don’t remember reading any advice on the matter – even Judy Blume let me down on this one. I was having an extremely emotional day and while I was folding the laundry tears just rolled down my face and my four year looked at me and said “Mommy, why are you crying? Is it because we hit the wall with the Swiffer?” I do not think I ever cried in front of my children before, am I allowed to do that? Are we pro this or against it? Will it scar them for life? I looked him straight in the eye and said “maybe it is time to put the Swiffer away if you are done helping to clean and mommy got some sad news so she is sad right now”. He then gave me a hug and said “you are all better now”. I wish so badly that everyone can get a hug from a four year old and have all their problems melt away.

This morning I saw on Facebook that someone I worked with at Mr. Youth passed away. She had a blog chronicling her battle against cancer and although I barely knew her, I read most of her posts and am in such awe of her strength and courage. My heart goes out to her husband, family and friends and hope they are all comforted at this time.

This afternoon I read a blog post about a friend of mine who is sick and while in my head I paint a picture she is on the mend, her brother’s post unfortunately said otherwise. She used to be my neighbor and I looked forward to seeing her every Saturday morning at synagogue to catch up on life and when she got sick she moved to Pittsburgh and every now and then I cry to my husband and tell him how much I miss my friend. So after the news about Briel, and then the update about Meredith, the tears just started to flow and I decided it is okay my children saw it. They should know Mommy is human and has feelings and sometimes feels sad and they should also know that it is okay to express those feelings and a good cry can actually make everything all better. (Inside Out anyone?) 

We as parents work really hard to teach our children so many things, how to use a spoon, how to walk, how to read, we cannot forget that their emotions can use some guidance as well. While sometimes it takes a hard day like today to make me count every small blessing in my life, I hope I am teaching my children to appreciate what they have and to have empathy for those who may not have what we do.